Hit and run suspect found under the covers

After two hit-and-run collisions, a man unloaded a bicycle from the back of his stalled vehicle and peddled away from the Los Carneros Road area. It was around 1 p.m., after the collisions resulting in injury to one person, that authorities were dispatched to the crime scene. Using information found in the abandoned vehicle, deputies tracked the intoxicated subject to his home where they found him in bed.

In an in-field lineup, three independent witnesses positively identified the subject, who also tested positive for methamphetamines.

Sore losers

An argument over a game of “beer pong,” a ping-pong drinking game, escalated when two players were beaten up by four contenders. According to the victims, who were heavily intoxicated during the incident, the suspects attacked and then, adding insult to injury, stole their bicycles. After the early-morning incident, the victims called 9-1-1.

Once on the scene at 5 a.m., using the intoxicated victims’ recollection of the incident, deputies pieced together the report. Following the incident, both battered victims were treated at a local hospital.

What was he thinking?

A 34-year-old man told authorities he hasn’t seen the missing engagement ring he intended to give to his new girlfriend since showing it to his ex-wife. The man reported the lost property earlier this month.

Deputies contacted the ex-wife who assured law enforcement she did not take the ring.

According to the ex-wife, the ring most likely fell out of the victim’s car.

Cliff-diver du jour

After consuming too much alcohol, two brothers visiting a friend in Isla Vista decided they’d hang out on the cliffs along Del Playa Road. One brother decided to climb down the cliff at 1:30 a.m. About a quarter of the way down, said the other brother, who witnessed the incident, the victim he either jumped or fell, causing significant injury to himself.

Although alive and stable, the victim needed to be extricated from the beach by medical personnel. He was transported and treated at Cottage hospital.

Uh, Dad ?

After parking her car in Isla Vista while attending a St. Patrick’s Day celebration, a young woman contacted authorities the following morning when she discovered the rear spoiler missing from her dad’s car. Certain the burglary occurred while the car was parked unattended in a heavy trafficked area, it wasn’t until the following morning, when she’d returned to her Santa Barbara home, that she made the discovery.

The victim estimates it will cost $1,200 to replace her dad’s sporty car accessory.

Auto-dancing

While on patrol just before midnight in Isla Vista, a deputy came upon four individuals dancing on the hood of a vehicle parked on Del Playa Road. Leading one beer-soaked subject away from the scene as the others quickly dispersed, the deputy questioned the motive. After learning the vehicle did not belong to the subject, the officer asked the subject if he thought the victim would appreciate somebody dancing on the hood of his or her car.

The dancer, visiting from San Luis Obispo, admitted his guilt and foolishness and was arrested for vehicle malicious mischief.

Big Sur Drive burglary

A Goleta resident returned home on a recent afternoon for find three laptops, with the combined value over $2,000, missing from his home. The burglary on Big Sur Drive occurred sometime between 9:30 a.m. and 1 p.m.

Who’s been prying around?

A South Kellogg Road resident returned home after work to find her front door handle and door jam pried apart. It appeared someone had attempted to force his or her way into the locked apartment. After having a look around, the 56-year-old victim told deputies it did not appear the subject gained entry.

Dude!

After his arrest for a different crime, a 22-year-old subject began acting suspiciously during the processing procedure at the Isla Vista Foot Patrol office. The fidgety subject was told he appeared to be under the influence of a drug.

“That’s because I’ve been doing coke,” he responded. To prove his claim, the subject encouraged a urine drug test.

The test results indicated the subject was right on target. Before he was transferred to jail, the subject was also charged with being under the influence of a controlled substance.

Special delivery

Dressed in blue jeans and high heels, a 22-year-old female refused to exit a taxi once it had reached her destination. The driver, unable to get the intoxicated woman out of his vehicle, drove to the Isla Vista Foot Patrol office for assistance.

Once out of the car, the woman nearly fell to the ground. Alone and unable to care for herself, she was arrested for public intoxication.